[Dshield] time out for a humor break

melvin smith Foxtail at emailaccount.com
Mon Oct 20 01:41:42 GMT 2003

John Sage wrote;

And get an advert with every update..

..or would it be an update with every advert? Hard to say.

My money's on more advertising than information.
John, please dont't give M$ any ideas. Remember
the BSOD ad idea?? ..........Mel.
                              *   *    *
Microsoft Announces Ads for BSOD
By Brian Briggs and Reinhard Gantar

Redmond, WA - In an effort to boost sagging 
revenue growth, Microsoft today announced it 
will begin selling advertising space on the 
company's world famous Blue Screen of Death 
(BSOD)©. The screen, displayed whenever 
Windows cannot recover from an error in the 
operating system's core, until now has 
historically served as a display of 
unintelligible diagnostic data that has not 
made any sense to anyone, ever, according 
to a survey conducted by the Gartner Group. 
In addition, the BSOD has scared most users 
because it was composed mainly of 
hexadecimal digits that, which in extreme 
cases, can lead to hallucinations, epileptic 
seizures and homosexuality in primates and rats.

The Bud Screen of Death
"Past efforts to make the blue screen more 
helpful by adding animated characters and 
changing the hue to a more user-friendly beige 
or aqua have failed," said head of BSOD 
Development Kate Verban. "When we failed to 
make the BSOD user- friendly, we decided that 
at least it could generate revenue. Displayed 
more than a billion times a day globally, the 
blue screen has a captive audience, with over 
90 percent of the computer desktops in the 
world. This makes it an excellent platform for 
advertisers, comparable only to the Super Bowl 
and makes watching the blue screen just about 
as exciting."

Tom Gordon, Director of Marketing for 
Anheuser-Busch, confirmed today that the 
beverage giant will be among the first 
advertisers, "We think it's a tremendous 
opportunity," said Gordon. "Picture this, 
you're working late at night on a crucial 
project. Your computer crashes. You've lost 
all your important work. It's definitely time 
for a beer, and we'll be there to remind you 
that the beer should be a beechwood-aged 

For earlier versions of Windows, the BSOD ads 
will be installed using the Windows Update 
feature. However, Windows XP systems connected 
to the Internet will automatically install the 
new software in the middle of the night when 
no one is looking.

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